Last week was my birthday.  Now, as you grow older and you have kids, obviously, your birthdays are not quite the celebrations that they used to be but, people still send you awesome texts and facebook messages and you feel good.  Awesome, right?

Well, this year, Noah decided to give me the greatest gift a mother could ever ask for.

The morning of my birthday, I got ready, took Noah to school (in which he told his teacher it was his mommy’s birthday and it was really cute), and went to work.  Around 9:30am, one of my coworkers said, “Hey, why is your eye so red?”  I told her that I had just been messing with it and it was probably just irritated.  By noon, my eye was a bit watery so I ran home at lunch and took my contacts out.  No biggie.  By 2pm, my right eye was almost swollen shut, goopy, and runny.  And, to make the day even better, my left eye was now bright red too.

You guessed it!  The best present in the world that a 3 year old boy can give to his mommy on her birthday is… wait for it… PINK EYE!!  To make matters worse, 2 days later, we discovered that he had given the pink eye to daddy too!  Who doesn’t love a gift you can share with family?!

I was able to get to the eye doctor right away, get some drops for me and Matt, and start the healing process.  Against everyone’s advice, I took the time away from work and parenting to go shopping and spend my birthday money.  And I actually spent it on myself!!  (Although I did buy a few things for Noah.)  I worked really hard to only touch stuff I was planning to buy and I rubbed hand sanitizer on probably every five minutes.  But, when I actually went up to purchase my items, I made sure to look down at my feet to avoid any possible recognition of the gnarly mess that I call eyes.

After a few days, Matt finally says, “I have a confession to make.”  I immediately start thinking about all of the horrible things that he could have done.  But, Matt’s kind of perfect so it couldn’t be that bad.

He says, “You remember a week ago when we kept Noah home from school because his eyes were so goopy with allergies?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, that day, I let him take a nap on your pillow and he may have rubbed all of that eye-goo all over your pillow case.  And I didn’t tell you… or wash the sheets.  Sorry.”

Seriously!?!?!  Well, we then were able to figure out that Matt shares a pillow with me when we take turns helping Noah fall asleep in his room at night.  Serves him right!

By Monday of this week, my eyes were back to normal.  I still had drops to put in daily so I have been wearing my glasses.  When I get to work on Monday morning, my fabulous coworkers thought it would be so funny to put “No Cooties Beyond this Point” all over the office.  And, in my office, they plastered the walls with gross pictures of giant red, goopy eye balls.  Happy Birthday, Callie!

Hey, Noah.  Next year, please just get me a card.  And maybe a hug.  (After you wash your hands.)